Last night I was talking to one of my good friends, and I’m sure she won’t mind me mentioning this, about being single in your twenties, and why we’ve been single right up to our twenties. I’ve never had a serious relationship, and neither has she. And whenever the offer of a relationship gets handed out, I run a mile – not because I don’t want one, but because I’ve convinced myself over the years that I’m not relationship material, so why is this particular guy interested in me? But then, I’ve changed a lot over the past couple of years so I shouldn’t really compare myself to what I was like then. For a start I was obese, I thought personal grooming was something dogs went for, and going to a club was my idea of hell on earth. Not anymore though.
Now, the dilemma that we both faced was, “Where do we find our Mr Right?” I don’t believe I can find my “soulmate” in a club – guys in there are alright to have a fumble in the dark with, but I can guarantee that if they tried anything while I was sober I’d direct them to the nearest mirror and tell them to have a look. So if they can’t be found in a club, where guys are practically handing themselves out on a plate, then that leaves a huge amount of places to look. But then if you look, you don’t find. Then my friend pointed out that she’s not been looking for the past few years and nobody has come her way so now what?
And then there’s the whole idea of going out (not dating) with somebody you perceive as more attractive than yourself. I’ve done that and guys can so tell if you don’t rate yourself highly. When I used to go out with Sophie, who was completely stunning in every aspect, I didn’t go anywhere near guys because why would I? They would be far more interested in her. But those nights turned out to be the best nights because she had a boyfriend, so the night would be spent dancing the night away and not caring about getting a guy. So do you sacrifice fun for searching for a guy?
Now, don’t get me wrong – I’m not complaining about being single. I’m just complaining about the fact that if I do decide I am ready for a relationship how the hell do you go about it? Obviously there isn’t a step by step guide on how to do it, that would make it boring, but the best way to find out is to get your experiences.
QUESTIONS TO YOU
1) Where and when did you meet your other half?
2) Did it take lots of searching beforehand?
3) Any other experiences you’d like to share?
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